


A State of Normal

by LinaRai



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcoholic Dean Winchester, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Depressed Dean Winchester, M/M, Post-Episode: s15e19 Inherit the Earth, but i will cry if cas and eileen don't come back, idk what that last episode was, no beta we die like castiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:55:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27541162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LinaRai/pseuds/LinaRai
Summary: Slowly, life returned to a state of normal that Dean hardly recognised.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 2
Kudos: 60





	A State of Normal

Slowly, life returned to a state of normal that Dean hardly recognised.

‘Normal’ for most people was the apple pie life that Dean had tried to get when he lived with Lisa. It was a nine to five and marriage and kids and a peaceful death.‘Normal’ for the Winchesters, on the other hand, had always been them on the road, had been the things that went bump in the night, had been several different potentially world-ending events. 

Dean didn’t know what to do with himself now that was over.

There had been something breathing down their neck for their whole life. Their road had started with trying to find their dad and had ended with them destroying God. Now, Dean felt very much like the car had finally run out of gas, and he had been left stranded. Jack was somewhere being the new God, Sam and Eileen had gone on a mini-vacation to celebrate, and Dean was alone.

He knew exactly who he wanted here, by his side, but he refused to think about that.

So Dean finished another bottle, slept for as long as his fucked up sleep cycle would let him, and he looked for a hunt. Chuck may be gone, but there was always some monster that needed dealing with, and he would really like to feel something right now. Even if it was just the pain of being thrown into a wall.

As Dean was looking, he drank. He drank more than he had ever drunk in his life; more than when Sam died, more than when he was a demon, more than the time that Lucifer killed-

No. He would not think about him. He  _ couldn’t.  _ Dean could barely function as it is, he did not need the added pain of that confession.

_ But he loved you.  _ A voice reminded him from the back of his alcohol-addled mind.  _ He loves you and you didn’t get to say it back. _

Dean drank until he passed out.

{o0o}

“Dean?” a deep voice asked, and oh man, he must be dreaming, because there was no way this was real

Dean attempted to lift his head. It felt like it weighed more than the whole world, the action sending a splitting pain through his skull. Not asleep, then. Hallucinating. Maybe he drank more than he remembered.

That was the only way to explain the sight before him. The angel -  _ his angel  _ \- who had gripped him tight and raised him from perdition, who had sacrificed himself to save Dean, who  _ loved _ him-

“Cas?”

Castiel smiled down at Dean, a shy, concerned smile that said  _ what have you been doing while I was gone?  _ and all that he could think was 

_ I love you too, dumbass. _

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I'm not really sure what this is but here it is anyway. Who else is stressed about the finale next week?


End file.
